LGBT Comedy Screams at Nun: ‘Your Religion Is at the Heart of My Misery!’

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It was bound to happen: a show about the LGBT community and an episode about bathrooms. In the December 29 episode of Work in Progress, “161, 153, 137, 122, 106, 104, 102 (We're Still Counting Almonds),” main character Abby (Abby McEnany), who is a lesbian, laments how she’s confused for a man when she uses the bathroom.

Such is the main plot of the episode, with Abby's partner, Chris (Theo Germaine), who is a transgender man, describing the use of “Refuge Restrooms,” which, as Chris explains, is an app for finding single-stall restrooms.

Abby being confused for a man even gets the police involved. Her friend, Campbell (Celeste Pechous), assures inquiring police officers that Abby is a woman, explaining, “I'm somewhat of an expert in this arena, and in there is wall-to-wall vag. Yeah, wall-to-wall vag,” as she gestures to Abby. As if such a line were not lacking class enough, Abby has to chime in with “a gentle reminder [that] not all women have vaginas.”

The episode concludes with a several minutes long rant Abby goes on as she’s mistaken once again for a man while using the women’s restroom at a Dolly Parton concert. Two men even follow her in. Abby manages to curse out all those present, by using the c-word, and also offends a disabled young woman and a nun:

 

 

Woman #1: Excuse me, this is the women's room.

Abby: I know.

Man #1: Oh, it is.

Woman #2: There are three men in the ladies room.

Abby: Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on a minute. I'm a woman.

Man #1: I'm not.

Man #2: I'm not either.

Man #1: Yeah, we just followed him.

Abby: I'm a woman.

Man #2: We didn't know. We just followed him-- her.

Woman #2: Well, I think you should all leave.

Abby: Excuse me.

Man #1: Yeah, let's leave.

Abby: No, no, no, we're not going any... I'm not going anywhere.

Man #2: You should.

Abby: Why would I leave?

Woman #2: Yes, you should.

Abby: You have no right to talk to me like that.

Woman #2: Excuse me?

Abby: Oh, I think you heard me. Who do you think you are? Oh, I'm sorry, do you want me to tell you? I'll tell you who you are. You are a small-minded cunt.

Men: Whoa!

Abby: Hey, I can say it! You and your fucking bullshit, hetero and gender-normative beige-ass life. My God, the way your fucking mind works, I bet people like me have no value in your world 'cause you don't know where we fucking fit. We're at a fucking Dolly Parton concert, sister. Look around. You're fucking ignorant! [stomps] Why can't I just go to the bathroom in fucking peace?! Why do you cuntsticks make everything difficult? Does anybody know how hard life is?

Trans Woman: I've got some idea, but keep going, honey.

Abby: Thank you so much. See, I have it even harder than her.

Trans Woman: Because?

Abby: Because of my OCD, I have to wash my hands like 40 fucking times in this filthy-ass bathroom, and I don't have the fucking luxury to come in and come out. No, I have to wash and wash and wash until I get screamed at or like fucking insulted. You all make my life suck! My life is worse than everybody else's! Ok, except for her.

Young Woman in Wheelchair: My life is pretty good, actually.

Abby: See, she has an easier life than me. You want to know why? 'Cause people don't fucking hate her on sight, and let's be honest, everybody feels sorry for her.

Young Woman in Wheelchair: Um, disabled people are not the yardstick to measure how much shittier your life could be.

Abby: Ok, I know that was a lot. You know what, I can see that I went over a little bit, but I'm just trying to tell you is that, life is hard, and I'm just having a hard time, and I-- Are you fucking kidding me? Are you really a nun?

Nun: Yes.

Abby: Your religion is at the heart of my misery!

Nun: I just really love Dolly Parton.

Bringing in the Catholic faith to blame on one’s misery was also an expected move from such a show. Work In Progress did so while bringing in the disabled and with a bunch of c-words. What’s really surprising is it took the show four episodes to do so.

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