Say It Ain’t So: Cardi B Threatens a Potential Congressional Run

January 13th, 2020 12:28 PM

Rapper Cardi B has apparently changed her mind on moving to Nigeria in the wake of US tensions with Iran, telling her fans that she’s considering a run for government office.

Some would say that this is a tragic turn of events.

In a series of tweets, the stripper-turned-rapper expressed interest in becoming a member of congress. Hey, if certain bartenders can do it, why not multimillionaire rapstars? It’s amazing to consider that she knows what a “congress” is.

On Sunday Jan. 12, Miss B tweeted, “I think I want to be a politician.I really love government even tho I don’t agree with Goverment.

Well of course she loves government, she’s a massive Bernie Sanders supporter.

Cardi’s subsequent tweets went downhill fast. She tried to provide some insight to her political platform but honestly it was hard to make out. Cardi wrote, “Like I was watching War documentaries. No matter how many weapons a country have you need people! How are you trying to go against a country and possibly start a war when this country lacks patriotism?”

We’ll take her word for it …?

We assume this was some appeal to anti-war propaganda, or an allusion to apprehensions about America going to war with Iran. She added, “I barely see people claiming they LOVE being American.”

Not in her circles, anyway.

Miss B mentioned that she would “have to explain a lot so I will have to do a video or a live [Instagram livestream, presumably] talking about it” another day. Yes, someone’s going to have to explain some part of that. Voter’s need some sort of coherent message. She did re-iterate her desire to join “Congress” though.

Cardi’s last tweet on the subject claimed, “I do feel like if I go back to school and focus up I can be part of Congress.I deadass have sooo much ideas that make sense.I just need a couple of years of school and I can shake the table.” Good on her, but let’s hope she doesn’t skip the English classes this time around.

Although at least we can rest easy knowing that the rapper is planning on staying and helping out. It’s certainly more patriotic than leaving for Nigeria, as she claimed she might do in the wake of President Trump’s decision to kill Iranian terrorist, Maj. Gen. Soleimani.