Colbert Cartoon Show Mocks Justice Kavanaugh as Sloppy Drunk

June 24th, 2019 1:06 AM

It’s 2019 and the elites in Hollywood are still unable to cope with the fact that Donald Trump is president and he has the ability to put conservative justices on the Supreme Court. So, a lame animated cartoon on Showtime is used to trash President Trump and anyone around him, including Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh.

In the June 23 episode of Our Cartoon President, titled “Supreme Court,” Justice Kavanaugh is portrayed as a drunk unable to control his thirst for beer. This is what counts as comedy to the writers of Executive Producer Stephen Colbert’s political cartoon.

Trump is pursuing the ability to self-pardon for “crimes past, present, and future” so Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell advises him to schmooze the Supreme Court Justices.



McConnell: You’re not screwed. You’ve got 4 out of 5 conservative justices in the bag. Just go schmooze the robes off of him.

Trump: I'm not the schmoozer, Mitch. I'm the schmooz-ee. Check the mug. I just wish I could add more buff Supreme Court justices who dig my vibe.

McConnell That’s called “packing the Court”, and there's nothing in the Constitution that says you can't do it.

Trump: I'm sorry, but why the eff did you not say this earlier? Upending centuries of judicial protocol is way easier than schmoozing John Roberts for three minutes!

McConnell: Just a heads up, though. The Democrats might have some thoughts on this.

Actually, Democrats have been talking about packing the Supreme Court a lot recently.

Trump flies the justices to Florida as his guests at Mar-A-Lago for the “1st Annual Supreme Court Gala Spectacular,” where he presents Chief Justice Roberts, whom Trump refers to as the swing vote, with the Guy of the Year Award. Kavanaugh is drunk, of course, because he is drunk throughout the entire episode. Eric Trump is babysitting Kavanaugh but he escapes and is missing for two days. Before he flees, he tells Eric that he wants to drown in “liquid fun” (beer).

At the end of two days, Kavanaugh shows up at the bar in Mar-A-Lago and Don, Jr. and Eric quickly take him back to Washington, D.C. where the Supreme Court is about to take up the issue of the presidential self-pardon. While the Court awaits Kavanaugh’s arrival, a Senate Judicial Committee hearing is shown for My Pillow CEO Mike Lindell, President Trump’s next Supreme Court nominee.

Kavanaugh balks at having to return to Washington but Don, Jr., and Eric tell him, “You belong on the Supreme Court deciding the reproductive fate of every single American woman." That, in a nutshell, is the single most important issue to pro-abortion liberals so it is no surprise that it is included in the dialogue.



Eric: I just wanted to prove I’m responsible and get Brett Kavanaugh back.

Don, Jr.: Sorry, Eric. As a child of privilege, you don't always get what you want the minute you want it. Sometimes you have to wait for things to fall into your lap.

Kavanaugh: Ahh!

Karaoke host:  And next up for karaoke is Coach Brett K!

Kavanaugh:'s everybody doin'?! Shut up! I don't wanna go to Washington! Take me to Tobin's garage for whip-its and garlic knots!

Eric: You belong on the Supreme Court deciding the reproductive fate of every single American woman!

Don, Jr.: We don't have much time! Floor it!

The Trump sons deliver Kavanaugh back to the Supreme Court, passed out and sick all over himself, and Eric Trump uses his ventriloquist skills to help Kavanaugh speak. The Court’s decision on whether or not President Trump will have the power to pardon himself is left unanswered because the written decision Justice Kavanaugh submits ends up just being a bar menu.

The show is truly unimaginative and randomly cruel to anyone in Trump’s universe. Can you imagine if a conservative had done a show like this during the Obama administration? No, of course not, because it would never have been allowed on air.