Comedy Central’s Michael Kosta wrapped up his week of bad military hot takes on by denouncing Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth for pressuring Scouting America to reverse certain changes it has made in recent years to align itself with the left side of the culture war. While imitating a conservative Scout and referencing the sexual abuse scandal, Kosta quipped, “We signed up to molest biological boys, not these trans weirdos!"
Kosta began by introducing a clip of the local NBC New York affiliate’s report on the subject followed by a mashed up clip of Hegseth, “Let's move on to someone we hope is only starting their day with iced coffee, Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth. Fighting an illegal war against Iran is his job, but he's still a Fox News host at heart, and that's why he's announcing a new wartime initiative.”
In the videos, the reporter declared, “Changes are coming to Scouting America, formerly known as the Boy Scouts. Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth has criticized the Boy Scouts, calling recent changes, quote, ‘Woke culture.’"
The Daily Show's Michael Kosta continued his week of military hot takes on Thursday by reacting to Pete Hegseth demanding Scouting America reverse some changes they've made, "Well look, I can see why conservative scout leaders were upset about that. 'Hey, we signed up to molest… pic.twitter.com/1PZQqB5osx
— Alex Christy (@alexchristy17) March 6, 2026
Hegseth was then shown adding, “DEI crept in…The focus on God as the ruler of the universe was watered down to include openness to humanism and earth-centered pagan religions… They even welcomed the destructive myth of gender fluidity and transgenderism to infiltrate their membership.”
Kosta reacted by retorting, “Well look, I can see why conservative Scout leaders were upset about that. ‘Hey, we signed up to molest biological boys, not these trans weirdos!’"
And people wonder why the late night comedy shows have seen their audience size collapse.
However, Kosta’s inability and unwillingness to understand conservatives was just beginning. He then cued up a second Hegseth clip by lamenting, “Also, why is it that every time I think I have a handle on what conservatives are mad about, they slip in something new? Earth-centered paganism? I don't even know what part I'm supposed to be angry about? Is it that the paganism is centered on the Earth instead of a different planet? But yeah, apparently the secretary of Defense was upset enough that he threatened to end the military's hundred-year history of providing support to the Scouts if they didn't get in line with his MAGA warrior ethos. And apparently, mission accomplished.”
In this clip, Hegseth reported that “Scouting America has agreed to comply immediately with the provisions of Executive Order 14173….No more DEI, zero. The, quote, "Citizen in Society" merit badge that encouraged Scouts to explore diversity, equity, inclusion, and identity… that badge has been discontinued.
The military has had a relationship with the Scouts since 1937, so it is not as if Hegseth’s remarks came out of nowhere. Furthermore, Scouting America’s decision to cave to the left’s culture war demands on everything from DEI to transgenderism to the original decision to do away with unique spaces for young boys and girls meant that a conservative Defense secretary was eventually going to push pack. The fact that Kosta would go so far as to equate that with the sex abuse scandal is disgusting.
Here is a transcript for the March 5 show:
Comedy Central The Daily Show
3/5/2026
11:07 PM ET
MICHAEL KOSTA: Let's move on to someone we hope is only starting their day with iced coffee, Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth. Fighting an illegal war against Iran is his job, but he's still a Fox News host at heart, and that's why he's announcing a new wartime initiative.
LOCAL NBC NEW YORK REPORTER: Changes are coming to Scouting America, formerly known as the Boy Scouts. Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth has criticized the Boy Scouts, calling recent changes, quote, "woke culture."
PETE HEGSETH: DEI crept in. [jump cut] The focus on God as the ruler of the universe was watered down to include openness to humanism and earth-centered pagan religions. [jump cut] They even welcomed the destructive myth of gender fluidity and transgenderism to infiltrate their membership.
KOSTA: Well look, I can see why conservative Scout leaders were upset about that. "Hey, we signed up to molest biological boys, not these trans weirdos!"
Also, why is it that every time I think I have a handle on what conservatives are mad about, they slip in something new? Earth-centered paganism? I don't even know what part I'm supposed to be angry about? Is it that the paganism is centered on the Earth instead of a different planet? But yeah, apparently the secretary of Defense was upset enough that he threatened to end the military's hundred-year history of providing support to the Scouts if they didn't get in line with his MAGA warrior ethos. And apparently, mission accomplished.
HEGSETH: Scouting America has agreed to comply immediately with the provisions of Executive Order 14173. [jump cut] No more DEI, zero. The, quote, "Citizen in Society" merit badge that encouraged Scouts to explore diversity, equity, inclusion, and identity, [jump cut] that badge has been discontinued.
KOSTA: I'm sorry, the secretary of Defense is micromanaging which Boy Scout badges are too DEI? Is this why we don't have a plan for the war? "I'll focus on the Middle East tomorrow. Right now, I'm busy figuring out how to make neckerchiefs look manly."
