Colbert Staffers Swoon Over 2020 Democratic Presidential Candidates

October 10th, 2019 4:40 PM

Politicians, they are just like us. There are very few people who enjoy the ever-nauseating segments where presidential candidates attempt to humanize themselves by relating to ordinary citizens on liberal television shows. Despite that, Stephen Colbert invited some of the 2020 Democratic presidential candidates to participate in one of these stunts on The Late Show, Wednesday night.

While there were a few softball political-esque questions tossed into the mix, overall the queries leaned into full-blown nonsense territory. The scene began with what was perhaps the most intellectually lazy ask of them all as staffers of The Late Show wondered; “Why do you think you could beat Donald Trump?”

 

 

The typical liberal answers commenced, with Mayor Pete Buttigieg noting; “Well, the American people, I think, are looking for the opposite of this President, and that's me.” Followed by Senator Elizabeth Warren’s response: “I know what's broken. I know how to fix it, and I'm building a grassroots movement to get it done.” And finally Senator Bernie Sanders offering: “The American people are catching on that Donald Trump is not only a pathological liar, he is a fraud.”

It was downhill into obnoxious land after that, as the next question to Senator Sanders was: “Hey Bernie, why are you always talking about percentages?” Trailing behind it, an inquiry to Senator Warren concerning the troubles of being a woman in politics: “Senator Warren, is it hard to be a woman in politics?”

Other absurdities included a woman asking Mayor Pete to take a picture with her baby, who she then leaves stranded in his arms. Then, to Senator Warren: “Do you really think you can beat Donald Trump?...How about in a 5k?... Game of chess?...”

The night closed with Senator Sanders, who was asked: “What do you think about candidates who pander to their voters on an emotional level?” The camera then pans to Sanders holding a puppy while joking; “Well, I've found that people respond best to hearing about actual detailed policy, rather than just pandering to the lowest common denominator. And my new campaign advisor, Mr. Poochy, agrees. Isn't that right? We like comprehensive proposals, don't we? Yes, we do!”

Just goes to show, leftist loon Colbert will go to any length to ensure a Democrat victory in 2020, even if he humiliates himself and his show in the process.

Transcript below: 

CBS's The Late Show

10/9/19

11:50:44 PM

COLBERT: Folks, next week the Democrats will hold their next Presidential debate, which is surprising, I didn't realize the last one had ended yet. The candidates are likely to face some tough questions from the moderators, but I know a lot of people here at The Late Show wish they could ask the candidates just one question. Well, Senators Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders, and Mayor Pete Buttigieg let them do just that. This is The Late Show's Just One Question.

STAFF: Why do you think you could beat Donald Trump?

PETE BUTTIGIEG: Well, the American people, I think, are looking for the opposite of this President, and that's me.

ELIZABETH WARREN: I know what's broken. I know how to fix it, and I'm building a grassroots movement to get it done.

BERNIE SANDERS: The American people are catching on that Donald Trump is not only a pathological liar, he is a fraud.

STAFF: If you could only pick one issue to focus on, what would it be?

WARREN: Corruption.

BUTTIGIEG: We gotta make sure that our democracy is fair.

SANDERS: I think an issue that has got to be dealt with is the planetary crisis of climate change.

STAFF: Hey Bernie, why are you always talking about percentages?

SANDERS: That's a misconception. I actually only talk about percentages roughly 30% of the time. And I only mention the top 1% of the top 1%, 50% of that time, tops!

STAFF: Senator Warren, is it hard to be a woman in politics?

WARREN: Well, I mean, sure. Sometimes. I mean, for one thing, you are constantly being asked if it's hard to be a woman in politics. But nobody ever asks a man if it's hard to be a man in politics.

STAFF: I see. So is it hard to be a man in politics?

WARREN: Uh, I think you might be missing the point.

STAFF: Great answer.

STAFF: Wow, Mayor Pete, this is so exciting. Would you mind if I got a picture of you holding my baby?

BUTTIGIEG: Sure. K.

STAFF: Thank you!

BUTTIGIEG: Ready?

STAFF: Great. I'm just gonna run home and grab my camera. Take good care of him, okay? If I'm not back, make sure he's asleep by 6.

BUTTIGIEG: Umm ok.

STAFF: Do you really think you can beat Donald Trump?

WARREN: In a general election? Yes.

STAFF: What about basketball?

WARREN: Absolutely.

STAFF: How about in a 5k?

WARREN: Oh yeah.

STAFF: Game of chess?

WARREN: Yup.

STAFF Ping pong?

WARREN: Yup!

STAFF: Street fighter II?

WARREN: Yes! Uh, wait, arcade or super Nintendo?

STAFF: Arcade.

WARREN: Yes.

STAFF: Hey, Pete Buttigieg. You're that candidate that has an identical twin, right?

BUTTIGIEG: Uh, no. I'm pretty sure you're thinking of Julian Castro and his brother, Joaquin.

STAFF: Oh right. Sorry about that.

BUTTIGIEG: No problem.

(Another Buttigieg appears)

BUTTIGIEG TWIN: Hey did someone just ask about me?

BUTTIGIEG: No, Bobby. I keep telling you, no one is asking about you.

STAFF:What do you think about candidates who pander to their voters on an emotional level?

SANDERS: Well, I've found that people respond best to hearing about actual detailed policy, rather than just pandering to the lowest common denominator. And my new campaign advisor, Mr. Poochy, agrees. Isn't that right? We like comprehensive proposals, don't we? Yes, we do!