CNN Comes Out for Cuckolding. Really.

This is CNN! It sure is: pretty gross, ultimately pointless and, yes, it has a bit of “fake news” about it. CNN’s website has an article by Ian Kerner, “a licensed psychotherapist and sexuality counselor in New York City,” about how “cuckolding can be positive for some couples.”

Forget alt-right invective for the moment. Cuckolding, Kerner helpfully explains, “has become fetishized into a powerful sexual fantasy for some men, who get aroused by the idea of their romantic partner engaging in sexual activity with someone else.”

Great. Keep it to yourself.

But no, CNN is spreading the news about super-important research. “According to a recent study by David Ley, Justin Lehmiller and the writer Dan Savage, acting on cuckolding fantasies can be a largely positive experience for many couples, and hardly a sign of weakness.” Savage of course, is a sex columnist, gay activist and anti-bullying bully who never saw sexual mores he wouldn’t flout and Christian teaching he wouldn’t mock. So he’s a reliable source.

Still, there really is research on this important issue. You can even buy it. “Savage joined with Lehmiller and Ley for a study of cuckolding fantasies and experiences in 580 gay men.” A representative sample if ever there was one. How could you fail to come to generalized conclusions using a tiny subset of 1.5 percent of the population?

And what were the results? “Their findings suggest that there are similarities between the way gay and straight men view cuckolding, but clear differences, too.” Umm, yeah. What else?

Well, get this: it’s not for everyone:

“We found several personality factors that predict more positive experiences acting on cuckolding fantasies. For those who have a lot of relationship anxiety or abandonment issues, who lack intimacy and communication, and who aren't careful, detail-oriented planners, acting on a consensual non-monogamy fantasy could very well be a negative experience.”

Oh, and also if you’re a normal, well-adjusted adult with a functioning moral compass.

To summarize: some people like to imagine their partners getting freaky with a stranger, and some even act on it. People who talk about sex for a living have decided they need to talk about this. It furthers the libertine agenda and it’s good for business. CNN staff likes to run racy headlines. They get to snicker about printing “cuckolding,” and it’s good for business.

But it’s anybody’s guess why any of this is anyone’s business.

Sexuality CNN.com Dan Savage

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