WashPost Dreams ‘Earth 2’ ‘Many Times Better’ Under President Hillary

April 10th, 2020 1:45 PM

Apparently, liberals have an alternative reality built up in their minds where Hillary Clinton beat Donald Trump in 2016 and now is an amazing president.

On Thursday, CBS All Access’ The Good Fight dreamt of a world where President Hillary cured cancer and saved the rainforest and polar bears.

Also on Thursday, writer Daniel W. Drezner mused in the Washington Post, “How is the pandemic going on Earth 2 under President Hillary Clinton?

When tweeting out the article, Drezner admitted, “In sketching out the counterfactual of how President Hillary Clinton would have handled the coronavirus, I gave her every benefit of the doubt. The result was much more policy success and just as much political rancor.” Of course it was.

In the essay, Drezner said he found this “counterfactual reasoning” to be “easy to envisage.” What exactly does he envision? Unsurprisingly, Clinton saves the world while Republicans are heartless buffoons. I guess she’s learned from her mistakes in Benghazi how to lead during a crisis?

On Earth 2, Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) is still Majority Leader but he dismisses Clinton’s advice to quarantine Seattle, San Francisco and New Rochelle, NY, as “hysterical” and “not thinking rationally.” Meanwhile, because of her efforts, “the national number of new infections dropped to less than 100 yesterday.” Because the virus is contained, the Clinton administration is working with Congress on a relief package worth only $50 billion, which Republicans want to be revenue-neutral.

“Compared with other developed countries, the United States has done relatively well in flattening the infection rate,” he writes, and Democrat operative Ron Klain is the “coronavirus czar.”

At least Drezner recognizes Clinton would overstep her authority and there would be constitutional challenges – he acknowledges, “A lawsuit pending before the Supreme Court will determine whether Clinton had the authority to restrict domestic flights and car traffic on the western seaboard.” The CDC tests are still botched under Clinton, too.

Republicans kept the House in 2018 and Paul Ryan is still Speaker in this world. Jeff Sessions is still in the Senate, of course, and he blusters, “The president is blind to how China will weaponize MS-13 gangs to infect our Southern states,” because the brutal MS-13 gang is always some joke boogeyman to liberals for some reason. Sessions also urges the House to “launch a third round of impeachment hearings.”

Also still on the political scene is Donald Trump, who is again the Republican presidential nominee for 2020.

Trump, who has essentially been campaigning since his surprisingly narrow loss in 2016, told his allies in Congress to demand an inspector general report from the Department of Health and Human Services for mistakes made in containing the spread of the coronavirus: “THE CDC WAS BAD AT EBOLA AND A DISASTER AT CORONAVIRUS!! WE NEED TO HEAR FROM THE IG!!!” he tweeted.

Trump also mocked a public service announcement by former presidents Barack Obama and George W. Bush advocating that those in the affected quarantine zones wear masks when they go outside. “Look at Tweedledum and Tweedledee — what a joke! None of this would have happened in a Trump administration. Sad!”

Surprisingly, Trump is beating Clinton by five points in the Midwest, according to polls.

Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL) is Trump’s presumptive running mate and Drezner pictures him “thunder[ing]” heartlessly, “The greatest military in the world was not designed to help the sick and feed the poor.”

Even the rest of the world would be better off. She leads a remote G-20 summit and the prime ministers of Spain and Italy are grateful to Hillary for her “medical equipment shipments to the regions hit hardest by the pandemic.”

“Earth 2 would be many times better than Earth 1. But it would not feel that way,” Drezner concludes. Because, alas, Republicans still exist on Earth 2 to muck everything up.