Politico Magazine Hypes Joe Kennedy III for President

February 10th, 2018 12:45 PM

Democrats have an ancient holy ritual called Adoration of the Blessed Kennedy. Its latest iteration appears in the February 6 Politico Magazine in which their chief Washington correspondent, Edward-Isaac Dovere, breathlessly reports on the possibility of a new assumption of the presidency by a Kennedy... The wet-lipped Joe Kennedy III.

Of course there are the obligatory denials by young Joe himself but Dovere's paean to the Prince-in-waiting is so chock full of saccharine as to give you a toothache while reading Kennedy Could Be the Democrats’ Best Hope (But May Not Want to Be):

The ridiculous strength of the Kennedy genes means he has bright red hair on top of his grandfather RFK’s face. In a political atmosphere wrapped up in celebrity and in a party up against the greatest branding achievement in American history, he has the highest-caliber name in politics—though he knows that the window for the political appeal of the Kennedy name is narrowing as the children of the '60s get older, and that the part of his own appeal that’s rooted in his youth ticks by with each day.

We are not worthy!!!

He’s a 37-year-old congressman at a time when the best-known figures in the party have wrinkles and gray hair; he’s started to make a name for himself as a leading liberal voice on health care and other issues; he chairs Congress’ Transgender Equality Task Force; he speaks fluent Spanish from his service with the Peace Corps in the Dominican Republic; he met his wife in Warren’s class at Harvard Law. He has the most revered family name in Democratic politics.

He lives, he breaths, and, most importantly, he is of the sacred Kennedy family! Coronation now!!!

Dovere continues his celebration of the Feast of Joe the Kennedy by noting the very very special magic of his response to the State of the Union Speech by the Evil Usurper:

Kennedy’s speech, meanwhile, was an earnest reading of Obama-esque themes, full of appeals to unity, dignity, higher ideals—and that there’s something deeper going wrong with the country, something more fundamental than political fights over Trump. It’s a fight over e pluribus unum: For Trump, “America First!” to a standing ovation from the Republican majority in Congress; for Kennedy “Out of many, one,” to a small crowd of supporters in a technical school in Massachusetts.

Kennedy’s big divergence from his prepared remarks was an ad-lib repeating the words “have faith,” as he rapped his knuckles against the lectern: “The state of our union is hopeful, resilient, enduring.”

He can ad lib too! Is there nothing a Kennedy can't do?

That sound you hear is the buckling of Dovere's knees.