So Funny We Forgot to Laugh: Colbert Jokes Georgia's Voting Law Like Throwing Jesus In Jail

April 9th, 2021 2:58 PM

CBS Late Show lecturer/comedian Stephen Colbert came up with an original take on Georgia's election bill late Thursday night: not only are Republicans racist vote suppressors, but they might as well be throwing Jesus in jail, too. Happy Easter season from CBS! 

For Colbert, it is obvious that the law is about voter suppression because "In the latest poll, the GOP trails Democrats in party affiliation 49% to 40%, the Democrats' largest advantage since the fourth quarter of 2012." So "the GOP has a plan to overcome the deficit at the voting booth: keep people out of the voting booth."

Colbert slightly overstated that poll because it includes independents who lean one way or the other, but he still maintained that given their deficit in the poll, Republicans have to compensate.

The alleged Obama scandal of the "tan suit" was tossed in like last week's moldy leftovers: "Back then, the Democrats were riding high, until Barack Obama made that historic foreign policy blunder and wore a tan suit. America still has troops stationed in the Men's Wearhouse!" Actual deadly blunders like being defenseless in Benghazi are forgotten, and lame Twitter jokes are repeated. 

Colbert then repeated one of the most common bits of misinformation, or at least misleading, parts of the law, "Georgia just passed new voter suppression laws, the most controversial of which is the one that makes it a misdemeanor to give food or water to people standing in line to vote. Yes, it's a crime to give people food and water."

He then played a brief clip of a satirical Gospel song, "Jesus gave me water. Jesus gave me water. Jesus gave me water. And we threw him in the jail."

After the clip, Colbert turned his attention to Gov. Brian Kemp, whom he referred to him as "One of America's premier vote suppressors" and "Hunka hunka burning crap." Teeing up a clip of Kemp, Colbert declared, "Yesterday, Kemp appeared on Newsmax and he gave advice to hungry voters, who will be forced to wait in line for hours."

The clip showed Kemp explaining that if voters are really that hungry they can order food, but he also could've added that if you are just in the business of handing out food with no ulterior motive then you could just provide it to the on-site poll workers who will then distribute it to those standing in line.

Colbert then wrapped up his diatribe against Georgia and Kemp by declaring, "It's that kind of care for the people that's captured in his campaign slogan: "Let them order cake." Let me get this straight, governor, so, you can order a pizza, but you've got to eat the entire thing, because if you share it with other voters in line, you could go to prison or worse, Papa John's."

Naturally, Colbert omitted the part of the interview where Kemp says the law seeks to address the long lines that resulted from incompetent Democrat-run counties.

This segment was sponsored by Energizer Batteries.

Here is a segment for the April 8 show:

CBS

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

11:58 PM ET

STEPHEN COLBERT: In the latest poll, the GOP trails Democrats in party affiliation 49% to 40%, the Democrats' largest advantage since the fourth quarter of 2012. Back then, the Democrats were riding high, until Barack Obama made that historic foreign policy blunder and wore a tan suit. America still has troops stationed in the Men's Wearhouse. But, the GOP has a plan to overcome the deficit at the voting booth: keep people out of the voting booth. Georgia just passed new voter suppression laws, the most controversial of which is the one that makes it a misdemeanor to give food or water to people standing in line to vote. Yes, it's a crime to give people food and water. Just like it says in the old gospel song: 

GOSPEL SINGERS: Jesus gave me water.  Jesus gave me water.  Jesus gave me water. And we threw him in the jail.

COLBERT: One of America's premier vote suppressors is Georgia Governor and "Hunka hunka burning crap," Brian Kemp. Yesterday, Kemp appeared on Newsmax and he gave advice to hungry voters, who will be forced to wait in line for hours:

BEGIN CLIP 

BRIAN KEMP They can order a pizza. They can order Grubhub or Uber Eats. 

END CLIP

COLBERT: It's that kind of care for the people that's captured in his campaign slogan: "Let them order cake." Let me get this straight, governor, so, you can order a pizza, but you've got to eat the entire thing, because if you share it with other voters in line, you could go to prison or worse, Papa John's.