CBS Late Show host David Letterman on Thursday begged Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney - who he referred to as "delusional" - to come on his show.
This came as a result of a recently released videotape of Romney saying at a Boca Raton fundraiser that Letterman hates him because he goes on the Tonight Show more often (video follows with transcript and commentary):
DAVID LETTERMAN: Now upon closer examination of the videotape, he goes into this whole thing about how he's been on my show, our show a few times, been on the Jay Leno show many more than a few times. And after that he says that I, "Letterman hates me," he says, “because I've been on the Jay Leno show more than I've been on his show.” Well, that's absolutely, the man is delusional if he thinks, honest to God, if he thinks I hate him.
Let me just draw an analogy. When George W. Bush was president for eight years, we didn’t have to write a single joke. Eight years. We loved George W. Bush. Yeah, we cut our writing staff down to one or two people. That’s all we needed. We loved him. And I said over and over, George W. Bush, I believe, I still believe it today, was our cutest president, cutest president. We are not in the hate business. We are here looking to make friends.
Now, Mitt Romney has been on the show many, many times. Let me ask you something, Mitt. If we hated you, why do we keep begging you to be on the show? How many times, how many times have we asked Mitt to be on the show, a hundred?
UNIDENTIFIED WOMAN: Yes.
LETTERMAN: About a hundred, maybe 200 times. He, let me go out on a limb here and say Mitt Romney or his little buddy, the vice president. Who’s the little buddy?
UNIDENTIFIED WOMAN: Paul Ryan.
LETTERMAN: Gilligan. His little buddy Gilligan. They have an open, an open invitation any time on short notice. You want to be here tomorrow, fine. Come tomorrow. You want to be here Monday, any time, I don’t care. Bring in Paul Ryan, bring in Mitt Romney, bring in Mitt and Mrs. Mitt and all the kids, bring in everybody.
We don’t hate you, Mitt. We don’t hate people. And by the way, if this is based on being on the Leno show more than being on our show, does it make any sense that we would hate a man who has gone through that suffering? Would it make any sense? No.
So, summing up then, Mitt, Mitt, Mitt, get a hold of yourself, we don’t hate you. Stop telling people we hate you. This, by the way, I’ll bet this is the Tonight Show poisoning Mitt saying, “Oh, you know, you know Letterman hates you.” So that makes Mitt afraid to come and be on the show. But he’s been on the show, was a wonderful guest.
We are imploring you, we are beseeching you, please, Mitt, try and fit us into your itinerary. Thank you very much.
This came two days after Letterman gushed and fawned over President Obama telling him, "You haven't seen me naked," "I feel very good when I'm with Michelle," and asking, "Is your reelection pivotal?"
Adding insult to injury, NBC announced yesterday that Ann Romney will be appearing on the Tonight Show next Tuesday.
As such, the late night war over the presidential candidates is definitely heating up.