George Stephanopoulos's Wife On CNN: 'Is Monogamy Killing Your Marriage?'

August 5th, 2010 6:47 PM

"Tonight - is monogamy killing marriage? If you let your spouse stray, will they stay? Rethinking wedded bliss in the 21st century."

Believe it or not, that's how "Larry King Live" began on CNN Tuesday.

Filling in for King was Ali Wentworth, comedienne, actress, and wife of ABC's George Stephanopoulos who in February did a striptease on the set of "Good Morning America" for her husband's 49th birthday.

The topic of discussion Tuesday: "Should couples have open relationships and disclose affairs? Could letting your man sleep with another woman actually help your relationship?"

In case you were wondering, the following aired at 9PM EDT (video follows with transcript and commentary):

ALI WENTWORTH, GUEST HOST: Tonight - is monogamy killing marriage? If you let your spouse stray, will they stay? Rethinking wedded bliss in the 21st century.

Then sharks in the water. One attacks and shreds the arm of a swimmer in Florida. Great whites are spotted off the coast of Cape Cod. They're lurking, look out.

Next, on LARRY KING LIVE.

Good evening, I'm Ali Wentworth sitting in for Larry. He's on vacation.

I'm very excited about this show tonight because it's two of my biggest fears. A great white shark attacking me or my husband cheating.

Now if you've ever been in a relationship you'll want to stay right here because we are talking about monogamy. It's been a hot topic on CNN.com all day.

Should couples have open relationships and disclose affairs? Could letting your man sleep with another woman actually help your relationship?

Well, that's what we're going to ask our guests tonight. Bethenny Frankel is here. She's a star of Bravo's "Bethenny Getting Married." She tied the knot in March.

Congratulations.

BETHENNY FRANKEL, ACTRESS, BRAVO'S "BETHENNY GETTING MARRIED": Thank you.

WENTWORTH: Holly Hill is the author of "Sugarbabe." She says women should negotiate infidelity with their husbands. And Sarah Symonds is an author and infidelity analyst.

Hello, women, and welcome to a hot topic. Infidelity. I want to -- I want to first ask, have any of you been cheated on?

FRANKEL: Yes. I was cheated on. His -- he had a girlfriend while he was -- well, he was actually sleeping with her. I was his girlfriend. And she called me in the middle of the night at about 2:00 in the morning and said, can I speak to Michael?

I guess he's going to be listening. Hi, Michael.

Hi, can I speak to Michael, and I said, who is this? And she said, I'm his girlfriend. And we hung up the phone and I waited two hours and I star 69'd her so I can call her back and get all the details.

WENTWORTH: And she gave you all the details?

FRANKEL: And she gave me the details. You need the details.

WENTWORTH: Well, you always need the details.

Now, Holly -- Holly Hill author of "Sugarbabe," you actually think that's OK. You think that if you negotiate fidelity with your spouse or lover that actually makes for a long and successful relationship. Am I right?

HOLLY HILL, SAYS WOMEN SHOULD LET MEN CHEAT: Yes. Absolutely. And those details that we talk about, if you're meeting the women that your partner is being with, you're not building her up to be some kind of supermodel in your head.

And we always want to know the details. And the best way to get the details is ask her out for coffee and be adult about what is a very educated and natural thing to be doing.

FRANKEL: See, I think that was a low point in my relationship, in my life to be talking to that girl. It really had nothing to do with her. I was in the wrong relationship because I was with someone who was cheating. And I think that negotiating within your relationship about being allowed to cheat is absurd.

WENTWORTH: You know, Holly, it's one of the things that I -- I'm married. And one of the things that I think of in my marriage is that, you know, I can go to my girlfriends for emotional support or my shrink, and there are other venues where I can sort of get what I want.

But I feel that marriage, the one thing I have with my husband, which is sacred, is a sexual physical relationship. Otherwise, why be married?

HILL: I guess the only reason it's sacred is because it's -- there's old-fashioned rules that we're obeying. And if you want to have a lifetime relationship with someone -- which is what we all want -- it's about negotiating things within their nature and their biology.

WENTWORTH: Now, Sarah, you say that -- you started a fantastic Web site, MistressesAnonymous. But you're not saying that that's a good thing. This is really a support group for a lot of women that have been brokenhearted because they had an affair with a married man or wanted to be with a married man. Am I right?

SARAH SYMONDS, AUTHOR & INFIDELITY ANALYST: Absolutely. And first of all, hi, Ali, thanks for having me on. Hi, ladies. I can absolutely resonate with Holly, I've been through certain, you know, similar experiences that she has.

But I have to say, if you are negotiating with somebody you probably are in the wrong relationship. Anything that needs that much negotiation probably isn't right and you should get out of it.

And that's who my Web site is about, that's what my support group is about. It's called MistressesAnonymous, which is like Alcoholics Anonymous. But in my group we can drink, and trust me, you need to.

It's, you know, a 12-step program. And literally I help women get out of their toxic affairs with married men, with unavailable men, with bad boys. It's a phenomenon that's going over America. You know women are attracting to these wrong guys. And I hear from women every single day. It's unbelievable.

WENTWORTH: Now I want to sort of open this debate up to all three of you, which is that a lot of people say, men and women clearly are different, and we have different needs and men really biologically, physically, their urge is to spread their seed throughout the land, and ours is to kind of, you know, incubate.

And when you put that in its very kind of specific scientific DNA kind of way, do we allow men because it is their physical urge to go out and have at it?

FRANKEL: I think women -- first of all, men are sleeping with the women. And I mean, speaking of the sharks that are going to be on the show tonight, there are a lot of women going out and preying on men. So I think it's equal. I think a lot of women have a big sexual appetite.

So, beyond the television shows, movies, music, trash novels, and magazines encouraging infidelity, a cable news network not only feels this is an appropriate subject, but also at 9PM.

With all this publicizing of extra-marital relationships, how do couples manage to stay together AND raise children that honor commitment and vows?

Seems to be more and more impossible, doesn't it? 

If you can take more of this, the full transcript is available here.