CNN: 'The Only News Channel to Give You All Sides'

Try reading the following without busting out in uproarious laughter: the good folks at CNN see themselves as the "middle ground" between Fox News and MSNBC -- "the only news channel to give you all sides."

"No spin. No affiliation. No agenda."

Bet you can't.

Well, as hysterical as it might seem, such was asserted -- with a straight face, no less! -- in a Los Angeles Times piece Tuesday (emphasis added, h/t TVNewser):

To maintain its momentum, CNN is trying to seize the middle ground and distinguish itself from its rivals' opinion-laden programming, even with the outspoken Lou Dobbs on its schedule.

"Get the facts from the only news channel to give you all sides," declares a promotional spot on the network. "No spin. No affiliation. No agenda."

"The mood of the country today I think is aggressively independent," said Jon Klein, president of CNN/U.S., over lunch in his Time Warner Center office on a recent afternoon. "And what they're looking for are answers, not pat talking points generated by the party headquarters."

"The conventional wisdom up until now has been the more opinionated the better. Our competitors are doing that. . . . We've really tried hard to differentiate ourselves as the real news network."

Now THAT's entertainment!

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