Comedian Blames Paris Attacks on Bush, Cheney, & Rumsfeld

December 2nd, 2015 6:53 AM

Left-wing lesbian humorist Kate Clinton wrote a column for The Washington Blade that mixed in discussion of her Thanksgiving meal preparations with her imagining how a “death star of awkwardness hangs heavy over the house of the Bush dynasty this November.” Then she awkwardly tried to blame the Paris terrorist attacks on George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Don Rumsfeld.

It all started with how the new Jon Meacham biography of George H.W. Bush is making the campaign difficult for Jeb:

I picture a Norman Rockwell scene with thought bubbles. Bush heads bent over a turkey more bronzed than John Boehner. Bush 41: “Yes, I called Cheney an Iron Ass.” Bush 43: “Nyah, nyah, Dad likes me better than you.” Poor Jeb: “Really? Now? The book now. Dad?” Barbara: (Muffled) “And who told you not to run?”

In interviews with Bush 41 for the book, Meacham writes that both Barbara and George claim they never said or even implied that Jeb would have made a better president than George. The whole family is proudly non-introspective. What a few sessions of family therapy might have done for this country. That the appalling ineptitude of poor Jeb in any way rehabilitates his brother George is galling.

I would trace the recent terrorist events in Paris back to Iron Ass Cheney, Arrogant Rumsfeld and George Bush’s folly in Iraq for you, but I will save it for my brief before the International War Crimes Tribunal that meets nearly every day in my head.    

Just for left-wing fun, she said it’s not the most awkward Thanksgiving event: "for me nothing can ever replace that Thanksgiving moment of Sarah Palin yammering on camera about something — World War Three whatnot — while behind her an old coot fed a turkey into a wood-chipper." They loved that on MSNBC, too -- but the killing machine in question wasn't a wood-chipper, since that wouldn't give you an intact Thanksgiving turkey.