Bill Press Denounces Jon Stewart Rally as a 'Big Masturbation Festival' Where Liberals Get Drunk

Mark down liberal radio host Bill Press as someone who really despises the timing of the liberal Jon Stewart-Stephen Colbert rally -- so much he called it "a big masturbation festival on the national mall" that will divert liberals from working for Democrat candidates when the stakes are so high. "Instead of getting out there and working their ass off...they're going to be out the mall yukkin' in up and then going out and getting drunk."

Press began his lecture on his show Wednesday morning by saying "Maybe it's time someone rained on Jon Stewart's parade." He didn't scream like Ed Schultz -- he sounded like he spoke in regret more than anger -- but the words were rough.

You’re going to hate me for it, but I think it's a big mistake.... First of all, what is this thing about? When it comes down to it, it is totally, totally self-indulgent. It's like a big masturbation festival on the Washington Mall on the Saturday before the election.

It's not about workers' rights or civil rights or women's rights or gay rights -- not that we have to be all that serious, but dammit -- and I know a lot of people by the way that are going to this thing. I know a lot of people that are excited about it. I did a little check yesterday about hotel rooms in Washington, D.C. -- you can't find one in Washington, D.C. for this weekend. They're all booked...

The second thing is the timing. It’s the Saturday before the election, when dammit! Everything is at stake! I mean, we could lose the whole freakin’ mess on Tuesday, November the Second. There are a lot of races out there, a lot of people out there, good people like Russ Feingold and Joe Sestak, you name it – Barbara Boxer and Michael Bennet down in Colorado, who really need our help, really need people banging on doors and making phone calls, and handing out leaflets and that kind of stuff.

This Saturday, this weekend is the key. This weekend is going to make the difference in dozens of House races and probably at least a dozen – look at Nevada, with Harry Reid and Sharron Angle – at least a dozen Senate races.  This weekend is going to decide, because of the Get Out the Vote activities, who gets over the top. And what I see is that too many young people, too many Democrats, too many liberals, too many progressives, instead of getting out there and working their ass off for what they believe and for people who are going to vote the way they believe, instead they're going to be out on the mall yukkin' it up and then going out and getting drunk.

Press insisted that he felt Stewart and Colbert are "the most talented two people on television," but that rally -- "I’m not against it. I just wish it weren’t happening this Saturday." He closed the segment by declaring "I find that the Rally to Restore Sanity is driving me freaking insane."

Ironically, as many young Obama voters flock to the Comedy Central event, Press's show promoted itself just then as “the official morning show of the Obama Generation.” Maybe not so much, there, Grandpa.

In the second hour of his show, Press returned to the topic -- "I think it’s a waste of time" -- and accused Stewart and Colbert of being egotists: 

No, this is come to the Mall to see me. Come to the Mall to see me, Jon Stewart. Or see me, Stephen Colbert. And see us try to be funny. And they probably will be funny. Pure self-indulgence, on their part, and on the part of the people who are coming. I think it's like a giant masturbation movement. The March for Masturbation on the Washington Mall Saturday.

Tim Graham
Tim Graham
Tim Graham is Executive Editor of NewsBusters and is the Media Research Center’s Director of Media Analysis