"Well," Buckwheat continued, "I fig'ud dat I dun seen 'bout everythin' when I seen de 'publicans turn a pregnant teenajuh 'n' huh baby daddy inter 'xampuls of healthy fam'ly values."
"You mean Gov. Sarah Palin's daughter, Bristol, and her boyfriend, Levi, who appeared at last week's Republican Convention" I said. "They're planning to get married."
"Yeah, dem," Buckwheat continued. "Kin you imagin' de hootin' 'n' hollerin' dem 'publicans wudder done if dat been one of Obama's kids? Dey sure wudn't have called her a chile of God!"
"I agree," I said.
"Bud dat ain't der thing dat got me so low," Buckwheat moaned. "It's dis new teller-vision ad John McCain dun started."
"I don't think I've seen it," I said.
"Well, it says dat Obama wants ter teach sex education to kindergarten chil'run befoe dey even lerns ter read," Buckwheat declared, with rising indignation.
"Dis ad is as bad as de Willie Horton spot de 'publicans used on Dukakis. It's as bad as dat commer'shul wid that horny white woman de Republicans ran ter beat Harold Ford when he ran fer de Senate down dere in Tennessee.
"Dey tryin' to make Obama seem like a lib'rul nut 'n' a child molester 'sted of a lovin' father 'n' family man! It's a damn lie."
Buckwheat was apparently needed as a soldier in White's war on "racial stupidity." The article's headline was "Palin and McCain Dun Got 'Em, Boss," and it carried an explanatory introduction:
The big doings on the presidential campaign trail prompted Jack White, a regular contributor to The Root, to revisit his favorite satirical playground, the fictional home for Retired Racial Stereotypes. He listens as famously-clichéd characters from yesteryear sally forth to battle racial stupidity.
