Peasants Revolt Against One Percenters at Burning Man Festival

September 7th, 2016 10:16 PM

If attending a Burning Man Festival is important to you, then there is something severely lacking in your life. However, in recent years the Burning Man Festival has become so hyped in the media that now the ultra wealthy glitterati has decided that it is an important checkoff on their bucket list. This has caused resentment among the peon attendees who greatly resent the hated One Percenters bringing along their home comforts and forsaking the common herd to live in their own cloistered community. 

Yeah, it is all incredibly silly but now the revolt of the Burning Man peasants has caught the attention of the media. The UK Telegraph has chronicled the burning issue of the class and culture divide at Burning Man. Your humble correspondent doesn't have a dog in this fight but I have to admit that I enjoy the spectacle of the "hooligans" ruining the Burning Man experience for the bored wealthy via guerrilla tactics and acts of sabotage.

It is supposed to be a utopian vision of peace and love but this year's Burning Man Festival has been marred by "hooligans" carrying out a "revolution against rich parasites".

The festival plays out each year in Nevada's Black Rock Desert where 70,000 people build a city in a week, burn a giant wooden effigy of a man, and then restore the arid playa to its original state.

In recent years it has become popular with Silicon Valley millionaires, and billionaires. Luxurious so-called "plug-n-play" camps have sprung up which use hired staff like cooks, builders and security, and allow international jetsetters to drop in for quick visits.

Yeah, a big change from the original purpose: to wallow in dirt and dust while thinking you are undergoing some great spiritual experience.

Many traditional "Burners" claim that is a betrayal of the spirit of "radical self-reliance" that is a cornerstone of the festival, which began in 1986.

As anger boiled over one camp called White Ocean, which hosts high profile DJs on a state-of-the-art stage, became the focus of anger.

The camp first made an appearance at Burning Man three years ago and its founders included the British DJ Paul Oakenfold and the son of a Russian billionaire.

Hmmm... Where to vacation this year? Hang out with Hillary in the Hamptons or bring my chef and butler with me to White Ocean at Burning Man? Decisions! Decisions!

While the camp was holding a party at which revelers listened to techno music it was attacked by vandals who flooded it with water and cut power lines.

The greatest act of rebellion since the crew of the Sea Shepherd tossed smelly rotten butter at Japanese whalers.

Tony Wichowski, a Burner, said: "And so the revolution has begun. Taking Burning Man back from the parasite class, back from the electronic dance music tourists. Taking Burning Man back for the people. This wasn't much but it's a great start."

Danielle Palmer, another Burner, accused the camp of having "paid staff and bouncers". She said: "You're a closed camp and not very welcoming. I got yelled at for coming to close to your 'gates'.

"We know you hire people in to cook and do other things. Feeding friends of your paid campers does not count as feeding Burners."

The only real purpose of Burning Man appears to be as a target for some hilarious, and well-deserved, mockery. One great example was this Quiznos commercial from last year.