Behar: Beck, Conservatives Like Kids 'Who Eat Their Own Boogers'

October 26th, 2009 5:32 PM

Joy Behar, HLN's conservative-basher of record, today derided conservatives as immature bullies who smell bad and pick their noses. Obama, by Behar's account is the smart kid in class who knows all the answers but keeps letting the bullies push him around.

Her bully characterization is astoundingly hypocritical, given that she goes on to suggest that Obama bully Glenn Beck and other conservative commentators into silence. And the President hardly seems like the kid on the playground "least likely to fight back." He certainly has the means, and has been using his pulpit to deride Fox News for the past two weeks for saying things that he doesn't like.

In the schoolyard of American politics, President Obama is the big, smart kid with all of the test answers who's being bullied by a bunch of Neanderthal ankle-biters from all sides.

Meanwhile, all the teachers are wondering, "Why does he take this crap? He's bigger and smarter than all the other kids."

It's no surprise the Glenn Becks of the world have been attacking Obama since the moment he stepped into the Oval Office. Beck and his blathering buddies on the right -- you know, the stinky kids in the coatroom who eat their own boogers.

Readers may have been surprised after Behar offered such a masterful and enlightening insight into the American political arena, that she went on to offer an absurd revisionist attack on the Bush administration.

The majority of the country is behind Obama [really?]. The situation just seems worse than it is because we're not used to this new era, in which you can actually criticize the president without being shouted down as an unpatriotic, Socialist, traitorous, granny-killing, freedom hater. After eight years of a presidency shrouded in darkness, we're not used to seeing the president's supporters, of all people, shining a light on his shortcomings.

Yes, this new era in which those who criticize the president are considered responsible agents of political dissent protected by the First Amendment. This era in which those critics are not dubbed racists by the news media and former heads of state, or accused of being un-American by the nation's eminent political leaders. Thank goodness we're beyond all that.

Back to the schoolyard, where Barry Obama is being bullied. You know what? He's big, he can take it. You know why? Because not only is he right in his beliefs, but he knows that if push comes to shove, he can lay out the rest of these runts with a couple of good smacks of his presidential pen.

Hmm. Laying out critics of the President with a couple smacks of his pen sounds terribly authoritarian. Is Behar suggesting that Obama could silence the few opponents remaining among major media outlets? What a wonderful new golden age of tolerance it is, when we afford the political opposition such tolerance respect.

Behar is morally outraged that people might criticize or, heaven forbid, oppose the President's agenda. When pundits such as her hurl around these epithets and childish accusations, and suggest that Obama use his executive power to silence dissent, they are revealing their true colors. Dissent is only acceptable when a Republican is in power.

When a Democrat is president, take cover. Behar and her ilk will come out swinging.