'He'd Be So Rattled': Kimmel And Meyers Dream Of Trolling Trump At Trial

May 14th, 2024 10:00 AM

ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel Live! has the week off, but that did not stop the eponymous host from traveling across the country to New York and NBC’s Monday edition of Late Night with Seth Meyers. Together, Meyers and Kimmel would fantasize about trolling Donald Trump at his trial and dream about him being convicted.

The duo was discussing their histories with Trump when Meyers observed, “You actually got mentioned in the proceedings because there was some texts and it was because you had Stormy Daniels on your show.”

While Kimmel took pride in that, he claimed it didn’t live up to Meyers’s experience, “I appreciate that. It doesn't compare to making so much fun of him at the White House Correspondents' Dinner that he actually ran for president.”

 

 

After Meyers wanted to forget the whole thing, “No, no, let's talk about yours,” Kimmel continued, “Which was your fault. But it was exciting even though you put in—you know, you put in the work, and it really pays off. I was excited to be mentioned. I don't know why I was excited to be mentioned, but I was definitely excited to be mentioned.”

Meyers then wondered, “But you would want to go down to the courthouse? If you lived in New York full-time, do you think you'd go down?”

Kimmel replied, “No, I want to go down with you” before recalling, “I think—because, listen, we know he hates us… Do you remember the first time you found out he really, really hated us? I was on a weeklong camping trip, where there were no motors, or phones, or anything allowed. And when I got off the river, my phone clicked on, and I just got message after message after message about Trump bashing us. And I thought, ‘Oh, I'm back in civilization.’ But what I would love to do is for you and I to go down there, and maybe as a -- because, you know, he's in some legal trouble.”

He then suggested, “As a gesture of goodwill, because we are human beings… I think we should bring him a whole bunch of little bottles of ketchup. Because you're not allowed to eat in the courtroom. You're not allowed to drink in the courtroom. Ketchup falls in that kind of gray area.”

Kimmel then turned the dynamic around and asked Meyers, “How close do you think we could get to him? And I mean emotionally.”

Meyers then imagined a scenario where, “I mean, based on the amount of people there, we could just go and wait in line and get in. And it would be -- he'd be so rattled if we were there. It would be like that SNL sketch where all of a sudden, Kenan realized Beavis and Butthead are there. He'd have the same reaction.”

He then wondered, “Have you thought about what would happen if he actually was convicted?”

Kimmel admitted that “I have thought about this. I dream about it. I really hope it happens.”

Maybe Kimmel could give the flowers he held in his lap during the interview to Alvin Bragg, that would certainly cement the late night comedian’s relationship with the Democratic Party.

Here is a transcript for the May 13-taped show:

NBC Late Night with Seth Meyers

5/14/2024

12:59 AM ET

SETH MEYERS: I wanted to congratulate you. You actually got mentioned in the proceedings. 

JIMMY KIMMEL: Thank you.

MEYERS: Because there was some texts—

KIMMEL: Well.

MEYERS: — and it was because you had Stormy Daniels on your show.

KIMMEL: I -- thank you. I appreciate that. It doesn't compare to making so much fun of him at the White House Correspondents' Dinner that he actually ran for president. 

MEYERS: No, no, let's talk about yours.

KIMMEL: Which was your fault. But it was exciting even though you put in -- you know, you put in the work, and it really pays off. I was excited to be mentioned. I don't know why I was excited to be mentioned.

MEYERS: Yeah.

KIMMEL: But I was definitely excited to be mentioned.

MEYERS: But you would want to go down to the courthouse? If you lived in New York full-time, do you think you'd go down?

KIMMEL: No, I want to go down with you.

MEYERS: Okay.

KIMMEL: I think -- because, listen, we know he hates us.

MEYERS: 100 percent.

KIMMEL: 100 percent. Do you remember the first time you found out he really, really hated us? I was on a weeklong camping trip, where there were no motors, or phones, or anything allowed. And when I got off the river, my phone clicked on, and I just got message after message after message about Trump bashing us.

MEYERS: Yes.

KIMMEL: And I thought, “Oh, I'm back in civilization.” But what I would love to do is for you and I to go down there, and maybe as a -- because, you know, he's in some legal trouble.

MEYERS: Yeah.

KIMMEL: And as a gesture of goodwill, because we are human beings.

MEYERS: Sure, empathetic human beings, no less.

KIMMEL: Nice people. I think we should bring him a whole bunch of little bottles of ketchup.

MEYERS: Uh-huh.

KIMMEL: Because you're not allowed to eat in the courtroom. You're not allowed to drink in the courtroom. Ketchup falls in that kind of gray area.

MEYERS: Condiments are allowed, yeah.

KIMMEL: That I think he could get away with a little bit of that. How close do you think we could get to him? And I mean emotionally.

MEYERS: Well I -- the funny thing is we could -- I mean, based on the amount of people there, we could just go and wait in line and get in. And it would be -- he'd be so rattled if we were there.

KIMMEL: Oh, yeah, he would.

MEYERS: It would be like that SNL sketch where all of a sudden, Kenan realized Beavis and Butthead are there. He'd have the same reaction.

KIMMEL: Except even Beavis and Butthead-ier than that, yeah.

MEYERS: Now, what do you think would -- have you thought about what would happen if he actually was convicted?

KIMMEL: If he is convicted -- yeah, I have thought about this.

MEYERS: Okay.

KIMMEL: I dream about it.

MEYERS: Okay.

KIMMEL: I really hope it happens.