No guns please, we're liberals . . .
As soon as "Good Morning America" began to tease an upcoming how-to segment today on protecting against home invasion, I immediately suspected the show wouldn't discuss one obvious measure: obtaining fireams and learning to use them.
And sure enough . . .
GMA ran the segment in the wake of the horrific home-invasion in Connecticut in which the the wife and two daughters of a prominent doctor were killed and the man badly beaten. An expert was brought in to discuss various measures, and Chris Cuomo added some suggestions of his own. They ranged from keeping shrubbery low, to installing lights, alarms and wind chimes, to putting peepholes in the door, to creating a "safe room" to which a family can flee.
But never did GMA breathe a word about firearms. My favorite moment was Cuomo's Cactus Defense. That's Chris's hand pointing at that lethal little mini-cactus in the window planter. View video here.
GOOD MORNING AMERICA CO-HOST CHRIS CUOMO: Something as simple as cactus. Sounds simple, right? Oh, they wouldn't care about that, right? But they do. They think about these things. Chimes, outside the window.
I don't know, Chris. If your home were being invaded, what would you rather have handy: a spider cactus or a Smith & Wesson?
Contact Mark at mark@gunhill.net
Editor at Large
Comments Policy
Mark,
July 25, 2007 - 08:37 ET by Dave RSo, I take it that what we are supposed do is hit 'em over the head with the chimes, and hope they fall on the cactus.
Yeah, that ought to work.
Good grief.
Help Fred defeat everybody.
Cacti don't kill people.
July 25, 2007 - 09:05 ET by motherbeltCacti don't kill people. People kill people. ;-)
STICK IT TO 'EM
July 25, 2007 - 09:17 ET by PawpawNYou're right, CACTI only STICK IT TO 'EM!!
Great point! I immediately
July 25, 2007 - 09:15 ET by PamGreat point! I immediately thought of my father's house with his chimes...He has those huge tubed chimes that sound like church....The neighbors never hear them, and my father falls asleep to them..All one need do is pull the center 'string" to the side, so how exactly does it deter someone?
That is bullsh1t! I would
July 25, 2007 - 08:38 ET by HelenSThat is bullsh1t! I would take my Les Baer 1911 .45 Thunder Ranch Special over a damn cactus any day! Besides, I can't throw accurately enough to actually stick the thing to anyone's eye in a moment of excitement. MUCH rather take my chances with the .45.
"Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare
Always good to hear from a fellow .45 fan.
July 25, 2007 - 08:44 ET by Dave RI am glad you didn't say .38 or, God forbid, a 9mm.
Help Fred defeat everybody.
Mine is my Giles
July 25, 2007 - 11:59 ET by BeowulfMine is my Giles Heavy-Slide 1911A1 with Black Talons and an extended mag (9 rounds). I have to admit that I also have a 9mm ready, but it's stocked with Hydra-Shocks (and there's always the good old Mossberg 500 12-guage with #4 steel shot for final backup).
The Closed Mind Erects Strong Barriers
Kimber Custom II and
July 25, 2007 - 12:44 ET by Mr. KafirKimber Custom II and Springfield XD-9 with 15 round magazine (illegal where I live). I would really like to have a Benelli M4 shotgun, I can sweep a room with it.
I wouldn't mind if I found
July 25, 2007 - 12:47 ET by HelenSI wouldn't mind if I found a Smith & Wesson 50 cal. revolver in my Christmas stocking this year :o)
"Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare
Can cactus even grow
July 25, 2007 - 08:40 ET by Hero SquadCan cactus even grow in average temperate climates? I thought there'd be too much water.
Oh, wait, I get it. Global warming is making it possible to grow a cactus anywhere now.
*****
"I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for a clown that gives a damn!" - Sticky the Clown
I have come up with a
July 25, 2007 - 08:49 ET by bws53I have come up with a guaranteed solution to Philadelphia's murder problem.
All citizens of Philadelphia are now required to carry a cactus with them!
Swish! I rule! I am sooooo smart!
Maybe they could
July 25, 2007 - 08:56 ET by Hero SquadMaybe they could even start a "guns for cacti" exchange program.
Knowing Philly, they'll probably end up having people show up with a cactus in the hopes of getting a gun in exchange.
*****
"I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for a clown that gives a damn!" - Sticky the Clown
Are we going to be required
July 25, 2007 - 09:04 ET by Ruths husband BenAre we going to be required to register our cacti? When cacti are outlawed, will only outlaws have cacti?
You can have my cactus when you peel my cold dead hands off my planter.
But one thing is certain, no one will be seeking a concealed cactus carry permit!
Will we need to get a
July 25, 2007 - 13:11 ET by HypocriteHaterWill we need to get a permit if we want to carry a concealed cacti?
}}}----> Cacti Protecti
July 25, 2007 - 08:53 ET by Cool ArrowOh, gosh! They've discovered the deterrent properties of cactus! Run for your lives you murdering burglars. They're loaded for Bre'r Fox.
This MSM fluff piece couldn't be more insulting. Three women are dead, the man of the house is widowed and has lost his daughters, and the MSM offers up cactus as a cure for liberal malfeasance?
The next step will be a report on how "some good" might come of this tragedy.
Cactus? How stupid. Don't come any closer, I've got a cactus, and I know how to use it!"
Cactus Injury
July 25, 2007 - 08:59 ET by TotheRightofReaganBut what happens when robbers tries to break into your house they are injured when poking their finger on the cactus and it draws blood. Can the robber sue for no signs stating that cactuses can harm you?
“Above all, we must realize that no arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. It is a weapon our adversaries in today's world do not have. “ – Ronald Reagan
}}}----> Cactus Castle law
July 25, 2007 - 09:06 ET by Cool ArrowMake sure you drag him into the house. You can slap him to death with cactus till the cows come home.
It's that Cactus Castle law.
ACLU
July 25, 2007 - 09:15 ET by PawpawNACLU would sue on behalf of the robbers-see, they're the AMERICAN CATCI LAWYERS UNION!
Point well taken there,
July 25, 2007 - 09:28 ET by dscottPoint well taken there, unless you publicly post "man trap" or some other signage of potential harm to an intruder, you become financially liable for any injury while they are on the property. (worthless judges). It is against the law to intentially harm anybody, including burglars. If you use a gun here in Florida, it can only be in defense of your person NOT property. Any slick lawyer will successfully argue a burglary was a property crime with no intent to harm the occupant, even if the scum had a gun in their possession. There are way too many dolt prosecutors and judges to reliably use a gun to defend yourself or your property even with a cactus.
I prefer the tried and true homeland security defense deterence, a big dog (50+ pounds) that barks. Scares the crap out of any would be burglar, better than any electronic security system. The dog doesn't need to be vicious by nature, just trained to snarl and bark at the approach of strangers. Be warned legally you must post signs: Beware of Dog
BTW- the CIA uses a really tough form of cactus as a perimeter fence around some of their facilities. Stands up to a car crash and razor sharp thorns.
“The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"
I worked with a guy who was
July 25, 2007 - 08:56 ET by The Wicked ConservativeI worked with a guy who was a victim of home invasion. The drug addled robbers broke in through the front door and 2 men gathered the family in the kitchen. Once they were there one kept the family at gun point while another ransacked the house. Something about the atmosphere convinced my friend that their captors intended to leave no witnesses. A moment of lapsed attention came and in that my friend and his brother had a chance to wrestle the "guard" and turn the tables. Once they had a gun the entire situation changed. No longer was there any boldness on the part of the would be robbers. They held the two and apparently a third driver escaped.
Now tell me where a cactus could have mitigated this family's peril? Now if instead they had a gun and maybe a sign out front that said "Warning! House protected by Smith & Wesson" they could have evaded the attention of the thugs altogether.
You can't save the Earth unless You're willing to make other people sacrifice. Dogbert the Green Consultant summing up the elite left.
You see, they did it all
July 25, 2007 - 09:08 ET by Ruths husband BenYou see, they did it all wrong. A speaker at the original Million Mom March once said: "If someone comes at you with a knife or gun, say, 'I know you're upset.' We all want to be valued as human beings."
That would have stopped them in their tracks.
RhB, don't forget all
July 25, 2007 - 09:31 ET by MikeBRhB, don't forget all those training films made by Monty Python: if someone comes at you with a ripe banana, drop a 16 ton weight on them in self-defense. ;-)
This story is a good example of the necessity of a "three strikes and you're dead" law. If the invaders had been the recipients of a "post-natal abortion" many arrests ago, the victim family would probably still be alive.
"A communist is someone who reads Marx. An anti-communist is someone who understands Marx." Ronald Reagan
The only Monty Python
July 25, 2007 - 12:01 ET by BeowulfThe only Monty Python the libs are interested in is "RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY"!!!
The Closed Mind Erects Strong Barriers
Hey, I like the .45 ACP as
July 25, 2007 - 08:57 ET by hatukHey, I like the .45 ACP as well but a .38 SPL or 9x19 MM still beat a cactus, right? Did the Libs forget to tell everyone to yell "HELP" so your LIB friends can run and hide while your loose your life?
}}}----> Cactus shortage
July 25, 2007 - 09:04 ET by Cool ArrowI was going to start up a Gourd Farm, but now that I've been enlightenen to the demand for Cactus, hot damn, I'm gonna be a Cactus Farmer. And I'll line the fence with Cactus to keep thieves from stealing my cactus.
Whoowee, why didn't I think of this before. Rabid dog comes by my place, I'll just trick him into the cactus.
Total news media incompetence
July 25, 2007 - 09:06 ET by sarcasmoThey don't even do plant-defense (which can be a good idea) right. What a wimpy little easy to avoid cactus. If you're far enough south, just plant bouganvilla (or better-yet persian or key limes) OUTSIDE under any window of concern, and in a short time it's thorn-city. But keep a gun of some sort anyway, just in case.
JMR
Give me a pump action
July 25, 2007 - 09:06 ET by Airforce_5_OGive me a pump action shotgun and a couple dogs. I dare you to bring you a$$ up in my house and let me show you something about home protection.
To bad these Libs can't bring themselves to say "Buy a Gun." or "Learn to shoot."
Cactus? Give me a break.
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Amen!
July 25, 2007 - 09:14 ET by Seabeach4348Amen!
I especially enjoyed the
July 25, 2007 - 09:19 ET by KevroyI especially enjoyed the 'panic closet'. Completely laughable. Do you think the home invaders' AK-47 would be able to penetrate that particle board door when they hear you on your cell phone calling the police? Me thinks so.
I am reminded of an episode on the Simpsons where Moe shoots a would-be robber in the spine;
Moe declares, "The next place he plans on robbing better have a ramp..."
And you'll be safe during
July 25, 2007 - 10:20 ET by danboAnd you'll be safe during the half hour it takes the police to get to you.
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
Besides the
July 25, 2007 - 12:03 ET by BeowulfBesides the laughable attempt at anti-gun subliminal suggestion from Slick-Dick Cuomo, let's look at what he proposed - little wimpy cacti and a wind-chime 4 feet from the window.
As for the "safe-closet", did this moron actually see the report about this incident? THEY SET THE FRIKKIN HOUSE ON FIRE!!! What possible good would a safe-room have done the two daughters? All these inane suggestions after the Father was beaten and the wife was strangled. And let's disregard how ridiculous the safe-room concept really is when these animals had already entered the home, tied everyone up, beat the father with a bat, and raped at least one of the daughters. How, exactly, would the family have gotten to their "safe-room"?
Now, let's make an honest extrapolation on what probably would've happened with a gun in the house...
We all know the old saying, slightly modified, about bringing a bat to a gunfight...
The Closed Mind Erects Strong Barriers
Don't kids plant
July 25, 2007 - 09:12 ET by Hero SquadDon't kids plant cacti?
*****
"I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for a clown that gives a damn!" - Sticky the Clown
That's it! "It's for the
July 25, 2007 - 09:15 ET by HelenSThat's it! "It's for the children!" You can provide home protection (...right...) and you can have a project for the children!
Two stones with one bird (brain).
"Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare
Yeah! Let's see: Grab
July 25, 2007 - 09:13 ET by Seabeach4348Yeah! Let's see: Grab the damn long cactus, jam it into the perp's eye, grab the other cactus (the ball-shaped one with the l o n g e r spikes), and ram it into the perp's groin! Why, if only the crew of the airliners brought down on 9-11 had a few cacti handy!
Then turn the perp around while he's trying to free himself from the agonizing insult of the impaling cacti, and now grab one of the tubes from the chimes and shove it home, rectally of course! That ought to do it! All without even hinting at using a firearm. In the mean time, call 911 and the local police one on the way!
Let's ignore the fact that once the person being burglarized grabs the cactus, he or she is going to impale themselves thereby disabling themselves from disabling them perp....all of this to avoid the most effective way of stopping the perp, which is the use of a firearm, to decisively separate the perp's brain from the rest of his body!
Time for me to go throw that nice juicy steak on the grill (later today anyway), increase my carbon footprint, and make sure that my 9mm has enough hollow points loaded so that I can save myself and my cactus at the same time.
Liberals must never, ever be allowed to run this country again. With advice like this, no wonder the terrorists are laughing at us!
I can't believe how
July 25, 2007 - 09:16 ET by Hero SquadI can't believe how irresponsible it was of the MSM to broadcast this report. Don't they realize that now terrorists will see it, and before long they'll be concealing deadly cacti on planes?
*****
"I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for a clown that gives a damn!" - Sticky the Clown
Depending on how stoic
July 25, 2007 - 09:21 ET by HelenSDepending on how stoic these wannabe terroristas are, one trembles to imagine just where and how they would try to conceal their deadly cactii.
Of course, it could be a boon for the whole Prep-H industry. Maybe they will come up with a teflon variety "for when you just have to get through airport security".
"Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare
Will the airports now began
July 25, 2007 - 10:35 ET by danboWill the airports now began screaning for hidden cacti?
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
Our local news reporter had
July 25, 2007 - 09:15 ET by msh1973Our local news reporter had the same suggestions last night in reference to a 2 year old who was taken from her bed a couple of days ago.
Yes, some sex prediator cut the screen enclosure, popped the slider, walked in an took the 2 year old girl, while her mom and dad slept! Thankfully, the parents woke up, yelled her name, the scum bag let her go and she came toddling around the corner. Dad took off but lost the perv, the police were called, but of course no one was arrested.
Sure, a cactus at the door would have prevented this animal from getting in...
What a joke!
July 25, 2007 - 09:19 ET by StogieGuyYeah, as if a cactus would have kept those scumbags out of the poor doctor's house in Connecticut. You literally can't make this stuff up! The sad thing is that there were probably tens of thousands of idiots around the country who were glued to their sets through this entire report and are now planning their trip to the nursery!
As for me, every time this sort of thing comes up it encourages me to plan for more guns and more ammo!
Prick
July 25, 2007 - 09:21 ET by PawpawNThe people who do these heinious things are already pricks, so how does cacti deter them! Never saw a home with a cacti door!
When I lived in New Orleans
July 25, 2007 - 10:17 ET by danboWhen I lived in New Orleans they wouldn't let you put a few strands of barbed wire on top a fence. Some people with brick walls cemented broken glass on the top. I used natures real barbed wire Bougainvillea.
That jumbble of one inch spikes. Plus it looks nice.
But a gun does anice job also.
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
}}}----> GMA writers
July 25, 2007 - 09:24 ET by Cool ArrowThose GMA writers are passing a joint right now laughing at liberal joystick Chris Cuomo.
In the GMA Writers
July 25, 2007 - 09:44 ET by Airforce_5_OIn the GMA Writers Room:
Writer 1: <cough> <cough> (passing the bong) Soooo what do you think dudes and dudettes? Maybe we should tell how bad it is for Ward Churchill now? Dude you know he is a political prisioner of the Man.
Writer 2 : (hitting Bong)
Writer 3: (hitting himself in the head with a shoe) Do you hear that man? It's my skull, I'm totally wasted!
Writer 4: ah dude? Who is Ward Churchill?
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
You're close CA, but wrong
July 25, 2007 - 12:30 ET by mulerider24You're close CA, but wrong herbal remedy. I think we are all missing the big conspiracy here.
An email I received
July 25, 2007 - 09:34 ET by dscottHOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2 Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine
4. Leave a note on your door that reads: Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside
“The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"
>>HOW TO INSTALL A HOME
July 25, 2007 - 09:53 ET by StogieGuy>>HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM<<
I can hear Chrissie Cuomo now: "But you forgot about the wind chimes and cactus!!" LMFAO!!!
Thanks for the laugh!
Add a pick up with a gun
July 25, 2007 - 10:07 ET by danboAdd a pick up with a gun rack in the drive. Confederate flag on the bumper natch.
That's real home security!
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
cactus, no - Glock, yes
July 25, 2007 - 09:34 ET by vrwc13spider cactus, no
Glock, yes
These people are just stupid
Men stumble over the truth from time to time, but most pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened. -Winston Churchill.
}}}----> I'm tempted
July 25, 2007 - 09:42 ET by Cool ArrowI'm tempted to start a life of crime. Reckon I could start out with Chris Cuomo's place?
After looting Cuomo's, I think I'll just troll around looking for signs the home owner is a liberal non gun owner. Just follow the cactus.
Cool Arrow: You think we
July 25, 2007 - 09:49 ET by Airforce_5_OCool Arrow: You think we could use some of these cactus in Bagdad?
I mean we could start throwing those at the insurgents. I bet they would run back to Iran then.
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
}}}----> MOAC bomb
July 25, 2007 - 09:55 ET by Cool ArrowImagine the devastation a MOAC could do!
They couldn't counter with Improvised cactus devices.
Never mind, I thought of
July 25, 2007 - 10:00 ET by dscottNever mind, I thought of something but it's too over the top...
“The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"
dscott: Never stopped you
July 25, 2007 - 10:10 ET by Airforce_5_Odscott:
Never stopped you before, why stop now?
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
You asked for it
July 25, 2007 - 10:41 ET by dscottWhy stop at cactus which just waits to be touched? Why not an assertive defense? Why not a genetically modified Vensus Fly trap? One of those 6 ft tall by every window, scarf down anything that attempts to pass. Of course there would have to be some secret chemical (pheromone) you would have to exude to prevent the plant from feasting on your family, pets and possibly friends. Great in-law deterence. It's that or a Bobcat...
“The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"
Molemen!
July 25, 2007 - 11:00 ET by vrwc13How about some Molemen from "Flash Gordon". They hide in your walls and come out when home-invaders enter. They'll never know what hit 'em.
Now you're just mocking
July 25, 2007 - 11:49 ET by dscottNow you're just mocking me... I knew I shouldn't have said anything, it's all AirForce's fault! LOL
“The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"
Now you are sounding like a
July 25, 2007 - 11:55 ET by vrwc13Now you are sounding like a liberal, blaming someone else! ) :
btw: like the idea of the bobcat. Now would that be with a bucket on the end or a hoe? Either way it would tear up the carpet.
Vrwc13, you said "hoe",
July 25, 2007 - 12:11 ET by MikeBVrwc13, you said "hoe", so off to rehab with you...AND you misspelled "ho", so back to third grade while you're at it.
"A communist is someone who reads Marx. An anti-communist is someone who understands Marx." Ronald Reagan
on man, and just when I
July 25, 2007 - 12:22 ET by vrwc13oh man, and just when I thought I was getting this "blogging" thing down. Ho well.
dscott: You gave into
July 25, 2007 - 11:59 ET by Airforce_5_Odscott: You gave into peer pressure bro...but if it makes you feel better, blame me.
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
I feel better now that
July 25, 2007 - 12:03 ET by dscottI feel better now that someone else is taking personal responsibility. LOL Enabler!
“The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"
Mother of all cactus? I
July 25, 2007 - 10:04 ET by danboMother of all cactus? I love it.
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
Cactus Rights ) :
July 25, 2007 - 10:09 ET by vrwc13Hey, what about Cactus rights?
Let's start People for the Ethical Treatment of Cactus (PETC)!
"don't argue with an idiot, they'll bring you down to their level and beat you with experience". Binxly,
Darn Cactus Hugger! The
July 25, 2007 - 10:14 ET by Airforce_5_ODarn Cactus Hugger!
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
New Westerns
July 25, 2007 - 10:04 ET by vrwc13Heh heh, John Wayne is rolling in his grave.
Other Titles
July 25, 2007 - 10:07 ET by Cool ArrowCactus Force
The Cacti of Navarone
Butch Cactus and the Lap Dance Kid
Nun with a Cactus
I'll give up my cactus when you pry it from my cold dead hand.
Those are some succulent
July 25, 2007 - 16:15 ET by Hero SquadThose are some succulent ideas!
*****
"I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for a clown that gives a damn!" - Sticky the Clown
vrwc: Magnum
July 25, 2007 - 10:08 ET by Airforce_5_Ovrwc:
All day Baby!!!! AALLLLLLLL DAYYYYYY!
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Where's MM? Maybe we
July 25, 2007 - 10:14 ET by vrwc13Where's MM? Maybe we should have a "Talk Like A Cactus Day"?
or Cactus jokes - hear about the guy dying of thirst in the desert? He tried to lick the moisture off a cactus, when they found him his tongue was stuck on the needles, and they asked him "Cactus got your tongue?"
new commercial
July 25, 2007 - 10:19 ET by Airforce_5_Onew commercial slogans:
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
btw: does planting a cactus get you carbon credits?
July 25, 2007 - 10:25 ET by vrwc13All this cactus stuff could be great for the economy, as "bad" as it is right now.
The Southwest could get a real ecomonic boost, but wait who will plant, grow, and harvest all this new crop? Maybe we need to get some workers from Mexico?
Keep it up guys. They're
July 25, 2007 - 10:32 ET by danboKeep it up guys. They're going to start demanding a concealed cacti law.
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
The NCA lobby will stop
July 25, 2007 - 10:35 ET by MightyMouthThe NCA lobby will stop that danbo.
"There are two types of people in this country; those who provide freedom and those who enjoy it." MM says...
Will our schools become
July 25, 2007 - 10:39 ET by The Wicked ConservativeWill our schools become cactus free zones? We need to think about the children!!!
You can't save the Earth unless You're willing to make other people sacrifice. Dogbert the Green Consultant summing up the elite left.
We can plant cactus
July 25, 2007 - 10:44 ET by vrwc13We can plant cactus hedges around our schools, that'll keep them baddies out.
Save a seal, plant a cactus!
Cactus Bumper Sticker (Pun Intended)
July 25, 2007 - 10:41 ET by Airforce_5_ONCA Bumper Sticker:
"They will get my Cactus when they pry it from my cold dead Hands!"
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
We would have to rewite the
July 25, 2007 - 10:44 ET by Airforce_5_OWe would have to rewite the 2nd ammendment to "Right to bare Cactus".
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Ouch! How do you conceal a cactus?
July 25, 2007 - 10:38 ET by vrwc13Ouch! How do you conceal a cactus? And where?
Not in your pocket, boot or
July 25, 2007 - 10:39 ET by bassndudeNot in your pocket, boot or sox. Maybe a woman could use her purse.
Save a SeAL, club a liberal!!
You know they can't even
July 25, 2007 - 10:46 ET by Airforce_5_OYou know they can't even own Cactus in England. How do they protect themselves?
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Come on VRWC, keep it
July 25, 2007 - 10:33 ET by Airforce_5_OCome on VRWC, keep it quiet! We have the chance to make millions here on the illegal Cacti market.
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Hillary tells a cactus
July 25, 2007 - 10:19 ET by MightyMouthHillary tells a cactus joke:
“I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I
thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.”
"There are two types of people in this country; those who provide freedom and those who enjoy it." MM says...
}}}----> Hillary Cactus
July 25, 2007 - 10:30 ET by Cool ArrowI'm thinking Hillary has a Prickly Pear
Prickly pair roflmao
July 25, 2007 - 10:30 ET by The Wicked ConservativeLaughing trailing off into a violent shudder...ugh!
You can't save the Earth unless You're willing to make other people sacrifice. Dogbert the Green Consultant summing up the elite left.
}}}----> How do I get to Carnegie Hall?
July 25, 2007 - 10:24 ET by Cool ArrowCactus, Cactus, Cactus.
"Michael Moore doesn't have
July 25, 2007 - 10:24 ET by MightyMouth"Michael Moore doesn't have a family tree, he has a Cactus tree, because everyone in his family are little pr*cks.
"There are two types of people in this country; those who provide freedom and those who enjoy it." MM says...
Lock Stock and Two Smoking
July 25, 2007 - 10:13 ET by The Wicked ConservativeLock Stock and Two Smoking Cacti
Young Cacti...starring Emilio Esteves
Top Cacti...starring Tom Cruise & Val Kilmer
And if you're into theater Annie Get Your Cactus
You can't save the Earth unless You're willing to make other people sacrifice. Dogbert the Green Consultant summing up the elite left.
}}}----> High Cactus
July 25, 2007 - 10:22 ET by Cool ArrowTreasure of the Sierra Cactus
Cactus Smoke
Cactus fight at the OK Corral
She wore a yellow cactus
The Cactus of Katie Elder
John Wayne: Big
July 25, 2007 - 10:13 ET by Airforce_5_OJohn Wayne:
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
}}}----> The Cactusist
July 25, 2007 - 10:17 ET by Cool ArrowYou're killing me. I can't type I'm laughing so hard.
}}}----> Killing me softly with cactus
July 25, 2007 - 10:14 ET by Cool ArrowCactus Blanca
Cool Hand Cactus
On Cactus Pond
My name is Cactus
Cactus is still my name
How green was my cactus
A Cactus to far!!! The
July 25, 2007 - 10:20 ET by Airforce_5_OA Cactus to far!!!
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Cool. He probably has a
July 25, 2007 - 10:01 ET by danboCool. He probably has a gun.
Liberals thing you shouldn't have a gun as you can't be trusted with one.
Cuomo, being he's a liberal, he's of superior intellect and morals so he can have a gun. After all, we're all envious of his superiority.
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
}}}----> Right danbo
July 25, 2007 - 10:10 ET by Cool ArrowI forgot about that legislator in houston who voted against it but shot the burglar anyway.
Home-owner to home-invader
July 25, 2007 - 10:41 ET by vrwc13Home-owner to home-invader "I've got a cactus, don't make me use it."
btw: can you fire a "warning cactus?"
Or is that. "I have a
July 25, 2007 - 12:54 ET by danboOr is that. "I have a cacti! And I'm not affraid to use it!"
Can we fire a warning prick?
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
Last Cactus Joke
July 25, 2007 - 11:37 ET by Airforce_5_ODon't they have a "Make my Cactus" Law in Texas?
Okay I'm done.
The only thing you should feel when shooting insurgents is the rifle recoil.
Cactus on our southern border
July 25, 2007 - 10:26 ET by Don DeskinsYeah, it has done wonders keeping out the illegal immigrants from Mexico... NOT
Uh, how does CSI do a
July 25, 2007 - 10:29 ET by MightyMouthUh, how does CSI do a ballistics test on a cactus?
(Great episode idea, if I do say, send the check to mightymouth@liberalssuck.com)
"There are two types of people in this country; those who provide freedom and those who enjoy it." MM says...
At airport
July 25, 2007 - 10:44 ET by HelenSAt airport check-in:
"Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare
}}}----> FOXNEWS Explosions
July 25, 2007 - 10:44 ET by Cool ArrowThere are a bunch of welding bottles exploding in Dallas.
Check it out.
Hey now, you need a three
July 25, 2007 - 10:58 ET by CapitalismRulesHey now, you need a three day waiting period before you can buy those cacti.
How long before Dianne
July 25, 2007 - 11:20 ET by MikeBHow long before Dianne Feinstein introduces legislation to ban fully automatic cacti? Or semi-automatic cacti that look like their fully automatic cousins? Will we soon need a Federal Cactus Dealer's license to sell cacti? Will the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms be replaced with the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Cacti? If so, will a bottle of tequila be regulated as alcohol or as a cactus? Will cactus control laws be enforced, or will they be ignored like our gun control laws? Is it true that a cactus society is a polite society?
"A communist is someone who reads Marx. An anti-communist is someone who understands Marx." Ronald Reagan
They'll definately ban long
July 25, 2007 - 12:51 ET by danboThey'll definately ban long needle clips.
I'd rather use the bottle of Tequila as a weapon.
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of truth and knowledge will be shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods. Albert Einstein
Yes, I always say you can't
July 25, 2007 - 12:07 ET by Ten7sYes, I always say you can't beat a cactus and a Mossberg. The cactus and the black autoloader with tactical barrel really set the livingroom off nicely. And for an understated accent, I recommend a sleek Sig Sauer; it stores nicely, if you'd rather only bring it out when just the right guests arrive.
You can try distracting
July 25, 2007 - 12:13 ET by vrwc13You can try distracting them by saying "Hey did you see my cactus over there?" And while they are laughing hysterically, whip out the old Sig (I prefer my Glock) and then say "Make my day!"
btw: good grouping counts extra
Men stumble over the truth from time to time, but most pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened. -Winston Churchill.
Yes, it can make for a
July 25, 2007 - 13:10 ET by Ten7sYes, it can make for a difficult decision. Do you go for the understated stylish Sig/Glock or the bold traditional Mossberg/Remington? The Sig is eminently convenient and effective, but nothing makes quite the first impression or clears a room like racking a shell and presenting the buisness end of a 12 gauge.
cactus-22
July 25, 2007 - 12:25 ET by vrwc13Has anyone thought this through? What if they are there to steal your cactus?
Let 'em have it! With
July 25, 2007 - 12:40 ET by HelenSLet 'em have it!
With both barrels ...and the wind-chime
"Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare
Yeah, but once someone gets
July 25, 2007 - 12:50 ET by Mr. KafirYeah, but once someone gets hurt accidently on the cactus, YOU KNOW there'll be an outcry to BAN cactus. And you know what that means: if you outlaw cactus only outlaws will have cactus!!!!
What's next? Cactus trade
July 25, 2007 - 12:58 ET by MightyMouthWhat's next? Cactus trade in or Cactus lock programs by the police? When will it ever stop!?! (these jokes that is)
"There are two types of people in this country; those who provide freedom and those who enjoy it." MM says...
Cactus Cuomo
July 25, 2007 - 15:41 ET by Galvanicdscott wrote: Point well taken there, unless you publicly post "man trap" or some other signage of potential harm to an intruder, you become financially liable for any injury while they are on the property.
It would be humoress if it weren't so true.
I think we can reasonably believe that (a) the cacti on that demo window box wouldn't stop a cat let alone a criminal, and (b) "Cactus Cuomo" has far better security at his residence than this assortment of prickly vegetation.