Wasting no time to ask a question that would potentially turn President Trump into the punch line, the May 14 episode of ABC’s Match Game began with this prompt from liberal host Alec Baldwin:
"By popular request, Axe Body Spray has released a cologne inspired by Vladimir Putin. The scent is strong and unapologetic, and it comes in a bottle shaped like a 'BLANK.”
Titus Burgess and Jane Krakowski both answered, “Trump.” Noting the stupidity of that response, Sasheer Zamata asked, “What does that mean?” I'm surprised nobody started muttering about Russian spies and stolen election conspiracies.
Alec: By popular request, Axe Body Spray has released a cologne inspired by Vladimir Putin." “The scent is strong and unapologetic, and it comes in a bottle shaped like a 'blank.’ ... Everybody knows, in the fragrance business, the bottle is everything.
Rick: We're gonna go there, huh?
Constance: -Is that inappropriate? I might have gone a little inappropriate.
Alec: Waiting on Darrell Hammond. Are you in, Darrell? -All right. -Everyone's in but Darrell. -Here we go. -Come on, Darrell.
Rick: There you go.
Alec: Whoo! "By popular request, Axe Body Spray has released a cologne inspired by Vladimir Putin. The scent strong and unapologetic, and it comes in a bottle shaped like a" what?
Cindy: Alec, a horse.
Alec: A horse. A horse. Alec: Tituss, what do you got, baby?
Tittus: Well...
Alec: Putin's bottle is shaped like a what?
Tittus: Cindy, that was a good answer. That's not what I thought. I went with what I thought was obvious. And I said shaped like a Trump.
Cindy: Ohh.
Alec: Sasheer. My love.
Sasheer: Yes? Yes?
Alec: What is Putin's cologne bottle shaped like?
Sasheer: If he had a cologne bottle, I was thinking about what I think of when I think of Putin. And I thought horse.
Cindy: Yay!
Alec: Well.
Cindy: Thank you! Whoo!
Alec: Darrell, you took an inordinate amount of time to write that down. And we're just curious what you came up with.
Darrell: I was trying to remember who he was. Um, pectoralis major.
Alec: Pectoralis major.
Darrell: Yeah, pecs, right? Pecs?
Alec: It looked like a set of guys' pecs.Yeah, his pecs. Jane?
Jane: Well, Alec, I gave an answer in tribute to you. And one of the things that you give the world -- great pleasure -- Trump.
Alec: Trump. Shaped like a Trump. Shaped like a Trump.
Sasheer: A lot of people think things can be shaped like a Trump. What does that mean?
Alec: Rick? We're looking for horse. We have one match.
Rick: We're looking for horse. So, of course, horse.
Alec: Horse!
Cindy: Yay! Thank you!
Alec: Constance, dazzle me with your perfume-bottle wisdom.
Constance: Whew! Well, I might dazzle you because I even drew it in case it wasn't as clear as it should be. But when I think of Putin...
Alec: Don't turn back now.
Constance ...I think of... Penis.
Constance: Penis. See my drawing?
Alec: See, what's funny -- When you put that down, a couple were like, "Yes! We want some good penis jokes!"
Constance: I love a good penis joke.
Alec: All right, we've got 2 for Cindy. And, Jerred, it's your turn.
Notice celebrity panelist Jane Krakowski takes it to fangirl level with host Alec Baldwin as she compliments his Trump impersonation for Saturday Night Live show skits. And, Constance Zimmer further plunges the dialogue downward with her declaration that she loves “a good penis joke.” Ok, then.
I am happy to know I wasn’t the only person thinking how odd it is that celebrities are unable to hear the name of Putin without associating it with the name of President Trump. The mainstream media must be applauding at home.
