Alt-Left Insanity: Liberal Shooting Spree = Time to Take Away Our Guns

June 16th, 2017 6:45 AM

Note: Normal people might find some of this offensive. (We hope. Dear Lord, please!)

“You never want a serious crisis to go to waste.” Those are the famous words of then-Obama Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel. Coming just a day after an alt-left nutball tried to kill a baseball diamond full of Republicans, it’s worth understanding how liberals see the event.

It’s an opportunity.

First, like the corrupt New York Times, they get to rewrite history and blame the left/right violence on Sarah Palin. (Yes, they really did that, despite all facts showing them to be lying morons. And then they had to correct it. Palin might have to wait a millennium or two for the apology she deserves.)

Next, it’s about the almighty liberal agenda. And you can thank lefty Amanda Marcotte from Salon for the typical hot take -- guns are bad, people who like guns are worse.

“Fears of emasculation, racist anxieties about crime, power fantasies about silencing dissent through threats of violence, and a widespread loathing for liberals and their insistence on rational evidence — all these things sell guns. They also get out votes for Republicans,” she wrote.

Marcotte’s piece, “Lessons of the “baseball shooting”: Gun violence feeds on itself — and even now Republicans won’t listen,” was the classic alt-lefty position. If only the right would change its views on everything -- guns, taxes, abortion, Big Government, etc. -- then everything would be OK.

Remember, it was a lefty nutjob trying to assassinate Republican congressmen, but it’s the right’s fault, not the left’s. “The gun industry and the National Rifle Association market guns with promises that owning guns will make a customer feel manly and powerful, and that fantasy has a power that can transcend political boundaries.”

Because it’s all about Republicans being wrong and also about taking away your rights. Marcotte wants Republicans “rethinking their resistance to saner gun control laws.” Saner. Gosh, that leaves tons of debate room. Support my position or your views are INSANE!!!

It’s hard to see the fig leaf of political “unity” lasting long on left or right with some in both groups thinking that way. And that takes us to our column this week, drinking, grave dancing and bigoted crossword puzzles.

In Vino Veritas: I was spared the horrors of Latin as a child, unlike my unlucky brothers. But this is one Latin phrase that is near universal -- “In wine, truth.” That takes us to the self-confessed drunkard(s) of Fusion and a piece headlined: “This New White House Is Literally Giving Me a Drinking Problem.” Writer Lindsay King-Miller is “author of ASK A QUEER CHICK,” according to her Twitter bio. And Trump, it seems, has driven her to drink. When her “partner” suggested they “cut back to one six-pack a week between the two of us,” she thought she had an “anxiety attack.” Actual quote: “In the last six months, my anxiety has reached an unprecedented level, spiking with every virulent homophobe, racist, or misogynist appointed to a powerful position, with every proposed funding cut that would eviscerate programs my friends and loved ones depend on.” This is a depressing read, filled with people who appear to be self- or professionally medicating and upset by about everything. Actual quote two: “‘American politics are extremely triggering,’ my friend Emily says.” There’s a lot of talk of triggers. Five mentions in some form or another -- all about our current political climate and how the author and many/most/all of her (Oh God, did I just gender her?) friends seem unable to handle it. If Fusion wasn’t such a shrill collection of lunacy, I might be tempted to be more sympathetic. But regular readers know Fusion is a staple of this column because it’s filled with absolutely demented stories. On the Fusion scale, this is about a 5. It’s only in the normal world where people would look at this and urge billionaire lefty Haim Saban to ensure his staff gets proper long-term care.

‘The Circus Always Sucked and Now It's Dead’: Liberals hate anything and anything that made America great or even just a nice place to live. Patriotism? Check. Religion? Check. Circuses? Wut? Yes, the left isn’t just satisfied that they drove The Greatest Show On Earth out of business. Now it’s time for three rings of grave dancing. Who else can we turn to but the Hunter S. Thompson wannabes of Vice for such a pathetic display. It took a writer and a bitter illustrator to target Ringling Brothers for its last show a night of “cheap nostalgia hawked like roadside trinkets for the last time.” Maybe if they had mocked President Trump during the performance, Vice might have given them a hint of appreciation. To Vice, the circus is some horror show, a relic of an America that never existed. Actual quote one: “To criticize the circus is to object to our reflection, our identity, to ingenuity and bizarro entrepreneurship, and the sham idealism and slow-motion grandeur we glop on all our home movies. It is like holding a UV light up to all your precious traditions and icons, and finding each of them glowing white like cum stains.” This isn’t a review, it’s a manifesto, one step removed from living in a cabin and fertilizing your food with your own feces. Actual quote two: “The loss of the circus is nothing to mourn. It was a traveling animal gulag, founded by bigoted frauds, run by sociopaths and goons and crooks.” I’ve watched and read a lot from Vice. I’ve seen one video snippet that was worth my time. That’s what passes for journalism on the left these days. And it’s horrendous. It’s less journalism and more howling at the moon. The rest of us will always remember the circus and performers as something larger than life. We will always see it not through Vice’s manure-covered glasses, but through the bright eyes of our youth.

What’s Black And White And Red All Over?: Answer: The New York Times crossword. But apparently not red enough for the inflamed anger of the alt-left. The crossword appeared in a chat with the Post’s Pulitzer Prize winner Gene Weingarten. Of course, the lefty Times wasn’t lefty enough for the Post. One reader recommended the Leah Letter because, “I thought you'd be interested in the topic of how old & crusty the NYT crossword has become.” Letter No. 34 was one long complaint about crossword words being “composed for a very particular reader with a very particular view of the world.” In other words, the puzzle creator isn’t woke enough to be current with PC terminology, even if the rest of the paper is. The Leah Letter then complains about the use of words such as: “Oriental,” “transvestite,” and even “sissies.” (When did sissies become a protected class? Oh right, when Obama got elected.) The puzzle is wrong thought and even “vexing” This is PC run amok. The puzzler shockingly still uses the term “Eskimo.” “The puzzle uses outdated, offensive terms for people, even if the New York Times itself has moved away from them,” complains the letter. Actual quote: “In other words, not much has changed since racist colonizers invented the term to describe native people living in cold climates on different continents.” Ironically, Weingarten agreed with the letter but defended its top target, the word “Eskimo.” Here’s Weingarten proving them wrong: “I can tell you that about ten years ago, when I wrote a story about the Inuits in Savoonga, Alaska, they preferred the term "Eskimo." They asked me to use it.” Liberals: We think you are oppressed even when you don’t.